Post by Swirl~Girl on Apr 9, 2012 12:12:50 GMT -8
Title:Lockhart, and, Petunia?
Rating:G
Word Count: 474
Warnings (if any):
Summary: After the war Petunia is hit by a malfunctioning memory spell and ends up roommate to the one, the only, Gilderoy Lockhart who had been affected similarly.
“Lockhart and Petunia, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the UGLY baby in the baby carriage,”
Shortly after the end of the war Petunia encountered a mysterious robed man. He said some gibberish and a bright light appeared, he suddenly jerked around to look at Petunia and said some more gibberish and, she awoke in a strange place, she did not quite know anything.
Under the correct circumstances Gilderoy Lockhart and Petunia Dursley could fall in love. They are very similar, if the above circumstance happened Petunia and Lockhart would both be unvisited by any relatives, it was said that Lockhart received no visitors at one point and neither would Petunia. The only ones who would care were muggles who would not be able to visit if they were even told. Also Petunia and Lockhart are both very selfish and uncaring for others beside themselves.
I opened my eyes and I heard a sweet voice saying, “Yes, Gilderoy, now you can say hello,” There were some stumbling footsteps like they were just now learning to walk, and suddenly there was a slight huff of an aged chair.
“Hi,” said a masculine voice, I began to open my eyes and saw a fuzzy image of a man.
“Hello?” I said, “Where am I, and more importantly, who?”
“You’re new,” The man said, I opened my eyes wider and saw that I was in a hospital. Odd. “Will you be my friend?” He said. It was funny, a grown man asking to be my friend like a child. “Do you want my autograph?” He said this time now I was thoroughly confused. Why would I want his autograph?
“Madam?” I called in the direction of the first voice I heard, my eyes were closing again.
“Yes?” She called back.
“Where and Who am I?” I asked.
“A magic hospital and you are Mrs. Petunia Dursley, a married mother,” She said matter-of-factly.
“Married? Boys have cooties,” I am unsure of why I said it, my common sense was deteriorating by the minu- “Heh, I farted,” I said oafishly.
“Hmmm, happens often,” She said
“What?” I responded.
“You’ve lost all common sense and your basic values,” She said, melancholy-ily
“Huh?” I questioned.
“Yes,” She replied.
“Thankz,” I slurred.
“Meet Gilderoy Lockhart,” The woman said, standing up.
“That’s me!” A childish, yet grown voice said, the same masculine one that had said that I am new.
“Anyway, you two are roommates, afflicted similarly,” She said.
“Huh?” I questioned.
“Hi! She said your name is Petunia, like a flower! I drew one for you!” He said totting over to me, after which he shoved a poorly drawn picture of a sunflower onto my lap. I got a better look at him, blonde hair, a charming smile, and a childish aura.
Note: I am now becoming increasingly Lockunia, or Pethart, I apologize as this is slightly creepy and cute at the same time.
Rating:G
Word Count: 474
Warnings (if any):
Summary: After the war Petunia is hit by a malfunctioning memory spell and ends up roommate to the one, the only, Gilderoy Lockhart who had been affected similarly.
“Lockhart and Petunia, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the UGLY baby in the baby carriage,”
Shortly after the end of the war Petunia encountered a mysterious robed man. He said some gibberish and a bright light appeared, he suddenly jerked around to look at Petunia and said some more gibberish and, she awoke in a strange place, she did not quite know anything.
Under the correct circumstances Gilderoy Lockhart and Petunia Dursley could fall in love. They are very similar, if the above circumstance happened Petunia and Lockhart would both be unvisited by any relatives, it was said that Lockhart received no visitors at one point and neither would Petunia. The only ones who would care were muggles who would not be able to visit if they were even told. Also Petunia and Lockhart are both very selfish and uncaring for others beside themselves.
I opened my eyes and I heard a sweet voice saying, “Yes, Gilderoy, now you can say hello,” There were some stumbling footsteps like they were just now learning to walk, and suddenly there was a slight huff of an aged chair.
“Hi,” said a masculine voice, I began to open my eyes and saw a fuzzy image of a man.
“Hello?” I said, “Where am I, and more importantly, who?”
“You’re new,” The man said, I opened my eyes wider and saw that I was in a hospital. Odd. “Will you be my friend?” He said. It was funny, a grown man asking to be my friend like a child. “Do you want my autograph?” He said this time now I was thoroughly confused. Why would I want his autograph?
“Madam?” I called in the direction of the first voice I heard, my eyes were closing again.
“Yes?” She called back.
“Where and Who am I?” I asked.
“A magic hospital and you are Mrs. Petunia Dursley, a married mother,” She said matter-of-factly.
“Married? Boys have cooties,” I am unsure of why I said it, my common sense was deteriorating by the minu- “Heh, I farted,” I said oafishly.
“Hmmm, happens often,” She said
“What?” I responded.
“You’ve lost all common sense and your basic values,” She said, melancholy-ily
“Huh?” I questioned.
“Yes,” She replied.
“Thankz,” I slurred.
“Meet Gilderoy Lockhart,” The woman said, standing up.
“That’s me!” A childish, yet grown voice said, the same masculine one that had said that I am new.
“Anyway, you two are roommates, afflicted similarly,” She said.
“Huh?” I questioned.
“Hi! She said your name is Petunia, like a flower! I drew one for you!” He said totting over to me, after which he shoved a poorly drawn picture of a sunflower onto my lap. I got a better look at him, blonde hair, a charming smile, and a childish aura.
Note: I am now becoming increasingly Lockunia, or Pethart, I apologize as this is slightly creepy and cute at the same time.